So many people these days see the images of people on
the internet, in person, and in magazines and get this need and desire to live
up to that image. How much do these air brushed images affect the
way you see yourself and what you don’t like about yourself?
If you’re anything like me… it affects me a fucking lot!
Believe it or not, for as long as I can remember I would wear pants ALL year round (hard to believe, huh?). I HATED my legs. My quads were much much bigger than any other girls and all I saw in them was fat. My thighs rubbed together when I walked, they were gross and full of cellulite and most shorts cut off the circulation to my legs.
Something finally clicked in my head one day that big “thunder thighs” are amazing. This is the core of my strength and these bad boys help me walk, as well as, hit PR’s in the gym.. and from time to time win quad competitions in the gym.
Although I’ve learned to love my legs again, I still have soo many insecurities. WHY? I get nothing but compliments, but I see nothing but my pudgy belly, the saddles bags, and my back boobs. Seriously, why am I so self critical? I’m making myself feel shit for the approval of strangers? For some dickwad on facebook? For someone that is upset about their own looks and insecurities that they will criticize what I have going on?
Fuck that. Seriously, fuck that.
I am going through a hard time and trying to learn to love and accept myself for who I am. I bust my ass training to get stronger and grow to be a better person in all. I am slowly learning that I don’t need approval from anyone but myself to be happy. If my belly jiggles when I get my clean & jerk up, so be it. But I nailed that lift.
I have to quit comparing myself to others, whether it be that I see someone with nicer abs or a stronger squat than me and feel like shit or I see someone slightly bigger than myself or can’t lift as much as me and I feel better about myself. I’m still comparing myself in a negative way either by thinking less of someone else or thinking less of myself.
I’m sharing this with all of you because we’re all human… but if you’re not happy with yourself, you will never be happy with anyone else. No one else can provide happiness for you. This is a VERY slow process that I’m slowly becoming better with and loving more of my flaws because that’s what makes me Courtney.
If you’re anything like me… it affects me a fucking lot!
Believe it or not, for as long as I can remember I would wear pants ALL year round (hard to believe, huh?). I HATED my legs. My quads were much much bigger than any other girls and all I saw in them was fat. My thighs rubbed together when I walked, they were gross and full of cellulite and most shorts cut off the circulation to my legs.
Something finally clicked in my head one day that big “thunder thighs” are amazing. This is the core of my strength and these bad boys help me walk, as well as, hit PR’s in the gym.. and from time to time win quad competitions in the gym.
Although I’ve learned to love my legs again, I still have soo many insecurities. WHY? I get nothing but compliments, but I see nothing but my pudgy belly, the saddles bags, and my back boobs. Seriously, why am I so self critical? I’m making myself feel shit for the approval of strangers? For some dickwad on facebook? For someone that is upset about their own looks and insecurities that they will criticize what I have going on?
Fuck that. Seriously, fuck that.
I am going through a hard time and trying to learn to love and accept myself for who I am. I bust my ass training to get stronger and grow to be a better person in all. I am slowly learning that I don’t need approval from anyone but myself to be happy. If my belly jiggles when I get my clean & jerk up, so be it. But I nailed that lift.
I have to quit comparing myself to others, whether it be that I see someone with nicer abs or a stronger squat than me and feel like shit or I see someone slightly bigger than myself or can’t lift as much as me and I feel better about myself. I’m still comparing myself in a negative way either by thinking less of someone else or thinking less of myself.
I’m sharing this with all of you because we’re all human… but if you’re not happy with yourself, you will never be happy with anyone else. No one else can provide happiness for you. This is a VERY slow process that I’m slowly becoming better with and loving more of my flaws because that’s what makes me Courtney.
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